An activist who did not feel like their impact was ‘impactful enough’

I remember a certain quote. About a mosquito, and being too small to make a difference. Let me look for it. I find it. It is attributed to the Dalai Lama. That, If you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito.

Are there moments you felt too small? Maybe you thought that all you did was for naught. That no one would see it. That no one would read the blog post. That no one would retweet the tweet that you thought was amazingly powerful!

Maybe you started pulling back. You saw yourself as a one-man army. You did not feel community around you. You wondered where your tribe was. To lift you. To retweet your post.

I sit here, looking back at those moments. When I felt too small. When I wondered for whom I resisted. For whom I tried to make the world a better place. What did you do to get out of that downhill road dear activist? Did you feel rage? That you had these questions? Did you feel sad? That you even had these questions to begin with?

Then I remember that day, when someone from far away told me they had visited my blog. They told me that actually they used a story from my blog for a training they carried out. That they used my story to teach others. To guide others. 

I smiled from within. It was such a pleasant surprise. To be reminded that what I did. My activism. Was recognized. And each day, I have to remind myself, that, a calling into activism, is a calling to make such a huge contribution to speaking out against injustice. Against exclusion. And no, to never think that I am too small. To never think that we are called into nothingness. No, we are called, to leave a mark. The question should not be, for whom did we leave a mark, for 10, for a million. No, the answer should be, that we are saying yes, to this calling. To bring change. 

May we never forget that we said yes, to life. Yes, to a calling so powerful.

Your friend.

With so much love. 

Elizabeth Ombati

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